Monday, August 31, 2015
2015 NFL Season Predictions
Green Bay Packers (11-5)
As long as the Packers have a healthy Aaron Rodgers they are always in contention for a Super Bowl. The Jordy Nelson injury is going to hurt, but the good thing is it happened so early on that they can take care of that issue now rather than later. Rodgers is the type of quarterback who instantly makes any receiver he plays with better, so I expect that this receiving core will step it up in his absence. Julius Peppers seems like he has been around the league for forever and a day, but yet he still is an absolute beast! Peppers along with Clay Matthews should have opposing quarterbacks running for days and throwing bad passes into that solid secondary. The Packers should be one of the top teams in the league this season.
Minnesota Vikings (8-8)
Getting Adrian Peterson back for the Vikings will help, but honestly it doesn’t send them into playoff territory. They may be able to toss a couple of upsets, but this team will be on the long train to mediocrity island because a whole lot of nothing is going on with this team!
Detroit Lions (4-12)
I hope Detroit has enjoyed what little bit of mediocre success they’ve had over the past couple of seasons because that ship has sailed! The Lions will be back to shitsville where they have reigned supreme for many years! Calvin Johnson is all you got and he can’t do everything! Matthew Stafford is completely overrated and only looks halfway decent because he has Calvin Johnson as a receiver, he does all the work. Just throw up that ball and chances are Megatron is coming down with it! But I have a feeling this is the season Stafford is finally exposed and not even his “go to” guy will be able to save him!
Chicago Bears (2-14)
The Chicago Bears by far will be one of the worst teams in the league! Jay Cutler still sucks so he should provide the same awful quarterback play he has offered for many years! The defense is unrecognizable and it’s obvious this team is in a rebuilding year. Hopefully that helps usher Jay Cutler off into backupsville where he belongs. It’s amazing this guy still has a starting job, I guess it goes to show what little talent there is at the quarterback position in the NFL.
Baltimore Ravens (11-5)
During the John Harbaugh era the Ravens have been one of the most consistently good teams over the years. The Ravens weren’t a bad team last year, they just had a lot of offseason drama distracting them along with major injuries. Steve Smith has already announced this season will be his last, so I expect him to play like he always has and go out in a blaze of glory! Elvis Dumerville and Terrell Suggs are two of the best linebackers in the league so you cannot underestimate this defense at all. This team has quality leadership and experienced players and coaches who know how to get the job done. This team works hard and it shows through their play on the field. The area’s of concern I have with this team are the ground game and the secondary. It is basically running back by committee until someone steps it up to claim the starting position. That is not enough to hold them back from being a contender this season.
Cincinnati Bengals (10-6)
The Bengals always feel like they’re going to be THAT team. You know THAT team that has potential. THAT team who is finally going to get over the hump and make a playoff run. THAT team that always gives people high hopes and lets them down time and time again. Until they can prove otherwise what else can you really expect? On paper this team isn’t too bad, but I have had to refrain myself from ever picking the Bengals to be a legitimate contender because I am all too used to the veil that the Bengals are hidden behind during the pre-season!
Pittsburgh Steelers (7-9)
The Steelers on offense will be one of the top teams in the league, but on the defensive side of the ball it’s going to be ugly. I’m not talking about typical ugly hard nosed Pittsburgh Steel Curtain type defense…I’m talking just straight up awful defense! Dick LeBeau is no longer the defensive coordinator and they lost one of their greatest leaders on defense, Troy Polamalu. The Steelers really lack any fire power on the defensive side of the ball and that will be awkward to see considering that has been the Steelers signature for the majority of their existence! The Steelers offense will outduel some teams this season, but that defense is going to kill them!
Cleveland Browns (1-15)
The Browns will forever be stuck in this vortex of garbage until they finally get some people who give a damn in their front office. They have no leadership, no quality players, and nobody it seems who is even interested in winning. The Browns will have a top five pick in the draft yet again next season…maybe they can finally figure out what to do with it?!?! They will have an entire season of losing to watch and figure it out!
Saturday, August 29, 2015
2015 NFL Season Predictions
Seattle Seahawks (13-3)
I don’t know how it’s possible, but the Seahawks got even better this offseason with the addition of Jimmy Graham. The Seahawks have yet to have a consistent “go to” wide receiver and I think they finally got him with this trade for Graham! Marshawn Lynch is still in the backfield carrying that rock running like the smash mouth back he is and Russell Wilson is still the captain leading the squad. The Seahawks on defense are still stacked and have one of the best secondary’s in the league it’s going to continue to be tough to pass on them. Basically there isn’t anything bad I can say about the Seahawks, I have a feeling they will take that gut wrenching loss from the Super Bowl and learn from it to do even more big things this season.
Arizona Cardinals (10-6)
The Cardinals started to build a foundation last season and look to keep building this season. I think the Cardinals will be one of the dark horse teams this season that take everyone by surprise. They are in a tough division so they will have to battle it out until the end, but Bruce Arians is a strong minded coach who will have his team ready to go. If Carson Palmer can stay healthy they should be a threat throughout the season and everyone seems to have forgotten about Larry Fitzgerald, but I haven’t. Not only is he still one of the best receivers in the game, but his leadership alone makes his team better. Their defense is suspect which is why I don’t think they have a shot at beating out Seattle for the division, but I think they have enough fire power with Patrick Peterson to make some big plays and get some big wins!
St. Louis Rams (8-8)
The Rams are a mish mash of everything, well everything except a good player. They have a bunch of decent players who will help get them some wins, but overall there is nothing going on with this team. Nick Foles is their quarterback…..WHOOP DI DOO!!! Todd Gurley is their draft pick who is coming off of a major injury so who knows how his season is going to go and they don’t have one halfway decent receiver (this includes tight ends) on the entire squad!! The defense is just as unimpressive so honestly this 8-8 record I am predicting is being very nice judging from this roster I just took a look at.
San Francisco 49ers (5-11)
It’s really hard to sit here and say I have faith the 49ers are going to be anything but straight up garbage this season. The entire team has done a complete 180 from last season, starting with the coach and all the way down to the majority of their defensive leaders. Also, lost some key pieces on offense. The new coach Jim Tomsula is a complete and utter buffoon in interviews so he should give us some good material to laugh at during the post game press conferences! Very breathy, awkward and doesn’t make a whole lotta sense….I’m looking forward to that mess! Colin Kaepernick struggled last year and I don’t see any drastic improvement now that Harbaugh is gone along with the loss of some of his weapons on offense. The 49ers have a long way to go to catch up in this division.
Denver Broncos (10-6)
I feel like last year was the year the Broncos window of opportunity to win a Super Bowl in the Peyton Manning era closed. They have a new coach, Gary Kubiak who wasn’t anything great when he coached the Texans so I’m not sure what kind of an improvement this is? Peyton Manning is only getting older, yes he is still a great quarterback and I believe he can still have a great regular season, but anything beyond is a reach. The injuries are taking a toll and extending the season through the playoffs will be tough for the Broncos. The defensive side of the ball is what needs to carry this team. They are strong, fast and dominant when they want to be. But like I said new coach, new system, so we’ll see what happens with this defense. The Broncos should be a competitive team this season, but like I said before this window has closed.
Kansas City Chiefs (10-6)
The Chiefs were another team last year that started to build a solid foundation. On offense they are led with their running back Jamaal Charles, one of the most consistent running backs in the league over the years. Alex Smith knows how to manage a game without making a ton of mistakes and he will finally have a halfway decent receiver to pass the ball to with the offseason pickup of Jeremy Maclin. On the defensive side of the ball is where this team is going to get ya! Justin Houston has been one of the top defensive linemen since he was drafted, doesn’t get a lot of hype either, doesn’t look like he needs it though because he’s still getting paid like the best in the league! Eric Berry is coming back from his cancer treatments and it’s obvious what a difference he made with the defense once he was lost for the rest of last season. The Chiefs should be one of the more competitive teams this season and I wouldn’t be surprised if they ended up winning their division. I just couldn’t pick them because Andy fat fuck Reid is their coach and I know he’s going to end up eating everyone’s food at some point and that will have an effect on the outcome of some games since the players will be starving!
Oakland Raiders (8-8)
It’s the best time of the year to be a Raiders fan! Right now hopes are high (so are they), the talk is loud and the Raiders are going to the Super Bowl!! Well at least to every Raiders fan they are! The most diluted fans in the league right now got their team winning it all no matter what is going on with this team! The rest of us with brains all know better. I’ll admit the Raiders won’t be complete garbage this season, but they won’t be a playoff team. There is still a ton of work to do with this team, but they should be able to throw a couple upsets along the way.
San Diego Chargers (4-12)
It doesn’t matter if the Chargers stay in San Diego or move to Los Angeles….they’re still going to suck!!
Thursday, August 27, 2015
2015 NFL Season Predictions
Dallas Cowboys (12-4)
YES…I know I have high expectations for my team this year, but guess what….they actually have a legitimate team this year and have the benefit of a GOD AWFUL division! This is the first offseason in YEARS that Tony Romo is not coming off of some horrible injury or surgery, he will finally start off a season completely healthy with a high powered offense at his command. We locked Dez Bryant in so I’m looking for him to continue what he’s been doing since the day the Cowboys drafted him and that’s make big plays! Ol’ Reliable Jason Witten is still there along with that stacked offensive line. Even if somebody gets hurt (which will more than likely happen) they have depth on the line and that’s why they decided to let DeMarco go in the offseason. DeMarco was a good player, but that offensive line can open up some holes even for the most mediocre of running backs. Am I saying Darren McFadden will be the almighty savior?? No, of course not. But the Cowboys have plenty of weapons and depth on offense, I am not worried about that side of the ball. On the defensive side the Cowboys made some big improvements starting with the pass rush. In the draft they lucked out and Randy Gregory fell to them, I think this dude is the future of the franchise on the defense along with last years pick Demarcus Lawrence. Greg Hardy was the big free agent signing of the offseason. He will miss the first four games due to suspension, but once he gets on the field this defense will become that much more dominant. Every quarterback they face better have his head on a swivel because if one of these guys doesn’t get him the other one will be right there in his face and I haven’t even got to the linebackers yet!! The secondary is going to be the big question mark this season, especially now that Orlando Scandrick has been lost for the season with a torn ACL and MCL. Overall the Cowboys are looking good from top to bottom and should be one of the dominant teams in the NFC.
New York Giants (9-7)
On offense the Giants should be able to make some big time plays with Victor Cruz and Odell Beckham Jr., but outside of that what’s going on with this team? They have Nobody Jones as their starting running back and a shoddy offensive line. On the defensive side of the ball their star player is now missing a finger and has yet to even report to practice, so what can we expect from this defense? Well I know one thing is for sure…we should see that dumbfounded look on Eli’s face more than usual this season!
Philadelphia Eagles (7-9)
My favorite thing about when a moderately successful coach comes in he thinks he’s gonna stroll on through the big bad NFL and change the way the game is played! Well guess what Chip Kelly you are next on this merry-go round of stupid! He has completely recreated this team, is that a bad thing? No not usually, but he got rid of all his worthwhile players. But whatever this just creates all the more fun for a fellow Eagles hater like myself! Who knows who the quarterback is? What about their running back? Quick name their starting wide receiver? Who will dominate this defense of finesse? These are all questions that will be answered at some point this season, but until then Chip Kelly will continue to make no sense! Also fuck you dude for bringing back Tim Tebow…nobody was asking for that bitch to come back! He hasn’t improved at all, still looks like a burning dumpster fire to me!
Washington Redskins (4-12)
What is there really to say about this team except for…..THEY SUCK!!!!! This will be a great year if you hate the Redskins as much as I do. It should be a total laughfest with Robert Griffin III continuing his descent into backupsville and it doesn’t help that his offensive line couldn’t block me! All I’m saying is this is going to be a LOOOOONNNGGGG season for dem Redskin fans!
New England Patriots (10-6)
Whether Tom Brady’s suspension is upheld or not doesn’t really play into my analysis of this team. Honestly, the Patriots aren’t that great of a team going into this season. They lost a lot of players on defense and don’t really have much outside of Gronk and Tommy girl on the offense. They do have the benefit of being in a weak division, which will help them not only get wins, but also help get them a playoff spot!
Miami Dolphins (8-8)
It would be nice to think that at least one team in this sorry ass division could compete with the Patriots, but unfortunately the Dolphins don’t have the glue to hold together this team. They have the parts and the signing of Ndamukong Suh this offseason was huge, but they have a weak ass coach and not a lot of talent on offense. There isn’t anything about this team that leads me to believe they are even ready to compete for the playoffs right now.
Buffalo Bills (7-9)
The defense will help keep the Bills heads above water…the offense is going to be the anchor holding them down! It’s going to be an exciting season full of mediocrity in Buffalo!!
New York Jets (5-11)
Nothing is going on with this team outside of new stupid headlines for the idiotic New York media…expect the entire season to continue on with that trend!