NFL Divisional Round Predictions

Wild Card Record: 1-3 (Turrible)

Divisional Round Predictions

AFC

Denver Broncos Vs New England Patriots

Jesus Christ will Tim Tebow's ass ever fucking go away? One more week with ESPN kissing his ass this shit is starting to get on my nerves! But oh well this Tim Tebow ass kissfest should be coming to a close this week. They travel to New England to play The Patriots and even though they haven't won a playoff game in a few years, The Patriots are still a good team and a much better team then the Denver Tebows...I mean Broncos. The Patriots defense is God awful, but their offense is fucking awesome when Tom Brady is on! The Patriots offensive line has to give him a clean pocket because The Broncos defense is aggressive and really good and they're going to be looking to go after Brady. Even if The Patriots play subpar on defense but great on offense they should get the win. The Patriots kicked The Broncos ass earlier this season and their defense actually had one of their best games of the season against The Broncos, they had girlfriend Tebow running for her life! I expect the same this time around, The Patriots have been known to make examples out of mediocre teams just to let the rest of the league know they're still around.

Patriots over Broncos 42-17

Houston Texans Vs Baltimore Ravens

The Texans have had a great year so far and overcame a lot of adversity to get to this point, they are missing two of their top players, Matt Schaub their quarterback and Mario Williams their beast Outside linebacker and yet they still are a competitive team. The Ravens have had a great year, they have been dominant at home, the defense has been great as usual and their offense can make big plays when they need them. They have lost to some pretty mediocre teams, but at home they are undefeated and they got a bye week to rest up and get prepared for this game. Both of these teams play great on defense, they attack the quarterback and can force big turnovers. But eventually at some point The Texans quarterback issues will catch up to them and I think this is the week. Ray Lewis and Terrell Suggs are two of the best linebackers in the league and you know they are ready for this game and ready to make T.J. Yates life hell! On offense The Ravens have to rely on Ray Rice if he doesn't get the ball moving then everything will be on Flacco and that usually doesn't work out for The Ravens. I think this will be a close game but I also think The Ravens are the better team and will get the win.

Ravens over Texans 17-10

NFC

New Orleans Saints Vs San Francisco 49ers

The 49ers have come out of nowhere this season and have been one of the best teams in the league. Jim Harbaugh has this team playing at a high level, especially on defense. The 49ers defense has been one of the tops in the league and have been carrying them throughout the season, their rookie Aldon Smith has been throwing around quarterbacks all season long and putting so much pressure on the line that they are creating turnovers as well. The offense gets the job done, they aren't flashy whatsoever and they usually aren't going to blow you out, but they can get a big score when they need it, or just have David Akers kick a bunch of field goals. But what sucks for The 9ers is Drew Brees and the growth on his face are coming to town and The Saints are on fire! I know The Saints don't play well on the road but right now The Saints are the hottest team in the playoffs and Drew Brees is playing out of his mind! He is so on point it's going to take a really good defense to stop him or a really good offense to out score them. The 49ers do have a good enough defense to stop him, but their offense cannot keep pace with them. I have a feeling The 9ers offense will let them down in the end and The Saints will get the win.

Saints over 49ers 34-17

New York Giants Vs Green Bay Packers

The Giants are like fucking herpes, they just don't ever fucking go away! Just when you're ready to write this team off there's Eli Manning's stupid retarded ass face at the podium discussing another victory. Even though he isn't the only reason they're getting the wins, he has some good, fast receivers to get the ball to and their defense is solid. The Giants front line is one of the best in the league even when they get injured the backup comes in and kills the quarterback. The Packers are the defending Super Bowl Champs and basically picked up where they left off last season, Aaron Rodgers has been on point all season long just ripping apart every defense that has faced him. He has a ton of weapons to work with and now their ground game has finally started to get going too so even more for the defense to worry about. The Packers defense isn't great, but they're also not terrible. They can make big plays when they need to and keep the score close enough to help their offense out. I have a feeling this game will be similar to when they played earlier this season a shootout between the offenses and whoever makes the big play in the end will get the win. The Packers are undefeated at home and the much better team Eli will probably throw it away to The Packers in the end.

Packers over Giants 35-31